Empower Your Confidence: Essential Strategies for Overcoming a Confidence Crisis

What You Really Should Know About Boosting Your Confidence

It has dawned on me recently that a confidence crisis is upon us. We are connecting less in person (still) and have found ourselves isolated more now than before the pandemic. This confidence shift has begged the question — is it just because we are near our communities less and scrolling more? Or does it go deeper?

An article in The Guardian by Viv Groscop reads, “… anecdotal research suggests that it’s no longer fun or sexy to mention the pandemic in social situations, but there are people who warm to the idea that we need to guard our recovered confidence carefully.”

So, are we all guarding our confidence? And further, is this what is leading us to a comfortably unconfident standard?

My incredibly biased research has led me to believe that women will often shy away from opportunities at work because they aren’t 100% certain they can complete the necessary duties with their current skill level. Their male counterparts jump on the opportunity with a mere percentage of the job duties in their skillset. In fact, as of 2023, the World Economic Forum declared that despite slow and steady gains in the proportion of women hired to leadership positions in the past eight years, at the current rate of change, the global gender gap is still 130 years away from closing. (Source: Harvard Business School article)

My question — why?

We, as a collective, are being more conservative with our careers because we fear catastrophe. In contrast, the beauty industry’s pockets have been padded by 5% more per year on average since 2020.

So what does this all mean?

It means we need a confidence boost.

Here are my ideas for ways we can boost our confidence as individuals. My hope is that these are tactical so that you can implement them tomorrow if you so choose.

Let’s dive in.

Let’s put the stretchy pants away.

I know what you’ll say, “My pants have nothing to do with my confidence.”

To which I say, “You’re wrong, my friend.”

What we look like determines a great deal of how we feel about ourselves.

Example: Think of the last time you loved—LOVED—your outfit and hair combo. You were likely walking through your day feeling yourself. Your energy was high. You were shaking hands and kissing babies. You were open to chat to the barista.

It only matters what you look like because it can determine your feelings. You don’t need to compare yourself to Ashley on Instagram, who has a stylist and a $2,000 monthly shopping budget. Compare yourself to yourself yesterday.

Wear something you love, and if that is stretchy pants, then make sure they are not busted, and you feel like you look damn good in them. Then rock ‘em.

Breakup with your negative friends.

This is controversial, I know. But I am not here to sugarcoat a dang thing.

Those friends you have who talk poorly about themselves (and others!) constantly—you know who I am talking about. Break up with them.

If that is a little bit too aggressive—sometimes I am known for this—then take a vacation from them. This looks like seeing and speaking to them less. This vacation should last as long as it takes for you to create a loving inner dialogue that’s louder than anything anyone else says.

Avoid forcing yourself to feel good through self-criticism.

There has been very little success in someone criticizing themselves into feeling good about anything. I am personally proof of this.

The only way to improve your inner dialogue is by practice, and the less you practice speaking to yourself with criticism, the more opportunity you have to rewire those thoughts towards positive, loving words.

What you say to yourself matters. In fact, it actually can make or break your confidence.

As a general rule — Be nice. But especially to yourself.

Speak up about your ideas.

It might not happen easily at first, and it might be a fake-it-till-you-make-it situation, but SPEAK UP about your thoughts, feelings, and, most of all, your ideas!

This means in your relationships, meetings at work, and when the server gives you the wrong sandwich. Your voice is valuable. Every time you tell someone about your ideas or you speak up about something challenging, you’re reinforcing to yourself that you can do it.

Jue Wong, CEO of skincare company StriVectin, told Diversity Woman Media in the article Speak Up and Don’t Apologize! , “Learning to be assertive is counterculture for many of us.”

By speaking up, you not only allow others to hear your voice and ideas but may also help them do the same.

So yes, speak up and don’t apologize.

With these simple steps, you will be sure to notice small notes of confidence popping up in your life on a regular basis. You will find that as you do these actions, they will get easier each and every time.

If this was helpful, please share it with someone who might enjoy it. And if you want more of me, join the community Stamp of Approval, the newsletter I write for high-performers, entrepreneurs, and professionals who want to bet on themselves and make an impact.